Tour and Conversation with Emily Bootle
Beverly Walker: Hi, Emily, thank you so much for coming to Carnegie Community Center today. Death Care is a subject that a number of our community members have wanted to get more information about. I was wondering if you could you share with us what is one of the most common misconceptions that people have?
Emily Bootle: For Death Care Services generally, I would say the biggest misconception is that there’s kind of one way of doing things. That you can either have a big funeral or you’re doing basically nothing at all. And there’s actually a lot in between. There’s a lot of possibilities in between that people can use or they just want something that’s in between. So I think that that was something that the funeral industry has played a part in perpetuating a bit. Kind of a misunderstanding and a lack of education for our communities. But I think that’s changing. So I think people think that you can’t call a funeral home unless somebody has died. But really, you can talk to funeral directors at any time. And ask them questions and use them as a resource in your community, so it’s really I think people are just have a greater distance than they maybe need to from death in general.
Beverly Walker: Can you share with us like how you got into this line of work?
Emily Bootle: I did a bachelor’s degree in psychology and was trying to figure out what I wanted to do afterwards, as we all do. It’s like a general diploma at this point. So I volunteered with victim services to the RCMP in Kamloops where I’m from, and just to see what it was like. Not necessarily because I wanted to work in police services, but just because it’s kind of a community activity or community role. So I did that volunteering and part of the training and one of the things that you do is you attend next of kin notifications. If there’s an incident in the community and somebody has died and the police are present and Victim Services gets dispatched. So I learned in that training that basically the training was like” “here are the funeral homes, call one.” And I was shocked. We’ve got our Ministry of Health. We’ve got our Criminal Justice System, but there is no Death Ministry. There’s no Ministry to support Canadians and British Columbians and I just assumed that there was some sort of public group does that, but there isn’t. We’ve got funeral homes. So once I realized that that was a niche, it piqued my curiosity, and then I went and I worked in E commerce and did other stuff for a few years and then decided to get licensed as a funeral director. It’s a two year apprenticeship and I completed it a few years ago and so I’ve been doing it I’m in my sixth year.
Beverly Walker: If there was just one piece of information that you wish every Canadian knew, what would that be?
Emily Bootle: That it’s that it doesn’t have to be scary. And that you can be involved. I think that one of the it’s just one of the biggest missed opportunities in our communities is the distance that people feel from their deceased and especially traumatic loss and sudden deaths. And even with our elderly, we have this phenomena of people kind of disappearing, where a death occurs, and you just don’t see them again. And I think that that perpetuates the fear and the mystery and the alienation from death, which at the end of the day is a normal part of life.
it’s the threshold you know? Birth, life and death. And so I think, what I wish people knew, what I would hope for everyone is that when they are called in a moment that they have the courage to step in, in whatever way feels right to them. It doesn’t necessarily mean having a viewing or having a funeral but doing something and speaking their name and stepping in because I think it does take a bit of bravery in our culture we’re very alienated from it. So I wish I wish for people to feel empowered to do that.
Beverly Walker: Thank you, Emily. I really appreciate you sharing your time with the Community Death Care Project.